The Boy That Couldn’t – Part II

Danish was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder at the end of the first-year of his BBA. But by then, irreparable damage had been done: Danish had dropped out of college, got kicked out of home and was left with no friends.

At that point, everyone who cared about him wondered how they had been unable to see the signs. Danish had always faced communication issues and therefore, couldn’t maintain any friendship past a few months. Although he had been a bright kid, his grades had started deteriorating over time, the most drastic change occurring in college when he failed to maintain his C.G.P.A. to the minimum required.

Sameer felt like an idiot. Why had he not asked Danish what was bothering him? Why had he not helped Danish in studies? Why had he not confronted Danish when Danish had been sitting on the steps by himself, mumbling and shaking his head, apparently conversing with thin air? Most importantly, why hadn’t Sameer realized something was wrong?

Sitting at the edge of the bed, Sameer started remembering horrifying scenes from the past.

Scene One: Danish’s parents screaming murder at him for dropping out of college.

Scene Two: Danish confessing to Sameer that he had a problem.

Scene Three: Sameer’s sister pointing out that Danish needed to see a psychiatrist for treatment.

Scene Four: Danish’s mum slapping Sameer for suggesting her son was “mental”.

Danish was thrown out of his house for the “shame” he had brought upon the family. Sameer was enraged but helpless. All he could do was convince Danish’s cousin to get Danish the help he needed.

Looking at the pictures, Sameer saw the confusion and fear behind Danish’s smile. He couldn’t imagine what the disease felt like or what Danish had gone through since his diagnosis. Sameer had researched on the illness to discover that it was more common in boys than in girls and usually appeared in pre-teen years. In fact, if caught early, the disease was very easily manageable. However, in Danish’s case, the illness had gone unnoticed for more than a decade and hence, had advanced to such a stage that Danish had troubles maintaining relationships or focus on studies.

While ADHD is not genetic, its cause is yet unknown. There are various symptoms of the disease but they generally fall in three categories: “inattentiveness”, “hyperactivity” and “impulsivity”. Danish confided in Sameer that his thoughts were always a mess with too many ideas running through his mind. He could therefore not pay attention properly and at times, couldn’t even tell the difference between his thoughts and reality. He said that it was like a film constantly playing in front of your eyes such that you are unable to focus on anything else.

ADHD has medicinal and behavioral therapy but the problem in Pakistan stems from the mindset that diseases of the brain make one clinically insane. This makes it difficult for people to recognize and accept such deficiencies and problems; most people try to hide their symptoms for fear of social rejection. What they don’t foresee are the numerous difficulties that lie ahead in terms of maintaining relationships, keeping a job, possible drugs/alcohol abuse, battling depression and troubles with the law.

Sameer realized that he couldn’t blame Danish’s parents for their reaction when he himself had failed to keep in touch with Danish. Picking up his phone, Sameer decided cleansing his room could take second precedence to calling Danish, who hopefully, had decided to take up his dream of teaching History to school children.